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sinfucks2024-06-30 09:10 am
synfluxmods) wrote in sinfucks2024-06-30 09:10 am
Entry tags:
TDM #5
TEST DRIVE & SIMULATION #5
▶ 001. ARRIVAL / CAFETERIA.
It happens in the blink of an eye -- a dash of time. You're taken from where you were. What you were doing.. it isn't important anymore, and slowly, you give up to desire your normal life. When you awake, figures are looking down on you from a surgical table.
"Yeah, this one will do; let's take them to the rest," That's all you see before losing consciousness again, only to wake up in a pod with many others.
"Your questions will be answered soon enough as I'm sure you will have many," a female, robotic voice says.
Just then, your pod opens in a dim corridor with many others. Your new life is about to begin... whether you like it or not.
The pods drain their stasis fluid which wakens each Outsider. When Outsiders emerge from their pod in only their undergarments which have been supplied to them and head to a locker room in the medical bay, to find a towel to dry off with, a set of gray loungewear to wear as LILITH makes the final decision in organizing the Outsider to their rightful teams. If a character has any accessibility needs, they will be found here. It's about then they will feel a sharp pain at the back of their eyes, almost like there’s a foreign body lodged on the inside of their head. This pain will subside quickly as their body adapts to the changes, but there will always be a sensation of something being not quite right. That their bodies have been changed forever. They would be correct in thinking that. In the pod, all Outsiders have been surgically fitted with ocular and brain implants that will enable them to communicate with LILITH and the rest of the crew, and feed them the information they require. Almost like a computer screen has been loaded into their brains, they will see a loading screen as the implant completes its download. A questionnaire will then pop up, waiting for their answer. A voice, robotic and feminine, will also read along in their brain for them.
█ █ █ LOADING COMPLETE … BEGIN ORIENTATION …
The system will give Outsiders one chance to provide a truthful answer and choose their username and civilian identity. Should they refuse to cooperate, the implant will download the answer directly from their brain (and give them a username or civilian name against their will). This questionnaire will then be posted on the network for all to view and reply to. Almost like an ice-breaker, if you will. LILITH wants all their newest recruits to learn about each other!
Outsiders will receive a quick brief about their situation: They will be told that the year is 2278, and they have been taken to Neo Tokyo, one of the last bastions of mankind in a world terrorized by various Kaiju and monsters. Only a third of the population remains, and LILITH has gathered talented people from other dimensions here as a last ditch effort to save humanity. Outsiders are free to continue asking LILITH questions through their implant, but there’s no guarantee they will provide them with a straight answer …
Outsiders will also notice an implant in their dominant wrist. This implant has a barcode in it that will enable them to purchase goods from the local stores in Neo Tokyo. They will receive a starting balance of 10,000 KRYPTOS (about USD 66), which is barely enough for a few good meals, groceries and supplies. They can view their current balance through a hologram window projected by their ocular implant.
While there would normally be a meal available for them in the cafeteria, this doesn’t seem to be the case this time. Robots working within the cafeteria will instead be handing out food ration bars to each Outsider. They are dense with calories and nutrition, but taste a bit like sawdust.
That familiar, robotic voice is heard again:
"Yeah, this one will do; let's take them to the rest," That's all you see before losing consciousness again, only to wake up in a pod with many others.
"Your questions will be answered soon enough as I'm sure you will have many," a female, robotic voice says.
Just then, your pod opens in a dim corridor with many others. Your new life is about to begin... whether you like it or not.
The pods drain their stasis fluid which wakens each Outsider. When Outsiders emerge from their pod in only their undergarments which have been supplied to them and head to a locker room in the medical bay, to find a towel to dry off with, a set of gray loungewear to wear as LILITH makes the final decision in organizing the Outsider to their rightful teams. If a character has any accessibility needs, they will be found here. It's about then they will feel a sharp pain at the back of their eyes, almost like there’s a foreign body lodged on the inside of their head. This pain will subside quickly as their body adapts to the changes, but there will always be a sensation of something being not quite right. That their bodies have been changed forever. They would be correct in thinking that. In the pod, all Outsiders have been surgically fitted with ocular and brain implants that will enable them to communicate with LILITH and the rest of the crew, and feed them the information they require. Almost like a computer screen has been loaded into their brains, they will see a loading screen as the implant completes its download. A questionnaire will then pop up, waiting for their answer. A voice, robotic and feminine, will also read along in their brain for them.
█ █ █ LOADING COMPLETE … BEGIN ORIENTATION …
Name:
Username:
Civilian Identity:
Age:
Species:
Origin:
What is your darkest fear?
The system will give Outsiders one chance to provide a truthful answer and choose their username and civilian identity. Should they refuse to cooperate, the implant will download the answer directly from their brain (and give them a username or civilian name against their will). This questionnaire will then be posted on the network for all to view and reply to. Almost like an ice-breaker, if you will. LILITH wants all their newest recruits to learn about each other!
Outsiders will receive a quick brief about their situation: They will be told that the year is 2278, and they have been taken to Neo Tokyo, one of the last bastions of mankind in a world terrorized by various Kaiju and monsters. Only a third of the population remains, and LILITH has gathered talented people from other dimensions here as a last ditch effort to save humanity. Outsiders are free to continue asking LILITH questions through their implant, but there’s no guarantee they will provide them with a straight answer …
Outsiders will also notice an implant in their dominant wrist. This implant has a barcode in it that will enable them to purchase goods from the local stores in Neo Tokyo. They will receive a starting balance of 10,000 KRYPTOS (about USD 66), which is barely enough for a few good meals, groceries and supplies. They can view their current balance through a hologram window projected by their ocular implant.
While there would normally be a meal available for them in the cafeteria, this doesn’t seem to be the case this time. Robots working within the cafeteria will instead be handing out food ration bars to each Outsider. They are dense with calories and nutrition, but taste a bit like sawdust.
That familiar, robotic voice is heard again:
"Greetings, my name is SYNTHIA and I will be taking care of you today while the rest of the crew is busy handling a recent issue. Worry not, my children. You are in safe hands."
▶ 002. THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME.
Existing Outsiders will receive a call to report to the data portal within Las Vegas. They’ve done their parts helping to take down the worm kaiju and assisting with the clean up of the city. LILITH’s army of cleaner drones can take the rest from here. It’s been a physically and emotionally draining mission for everyone, and it’s time to head home. The beaming back to Neo Tokyo will go rather smoothly for the most part (and yes, holding someone’s hand through it still helps), but upon arrival, Outsiders might be struck with a splitting headache, nausea and vertigo. They might need an hour or so to recuperate, which they can do in their rooms or the sick bay.
New and fresh Outsiders will be given the task to take care of their seniors as they recuperate. Make sure they have water and food (even if it’s terrible ration bars). Give them a massage, or cheer them up because they’ve had such a difficult mission! It’s a great way to build bonds and get to know your teammates. Ask them what happened in Vegas! They’ll be more than happy to tell you.
New and fresh Outsiders will be given the task to take care of their seniors as they recuperate. Make sure they have water and food (even if it’s terrible ration bars). Give them a massage, or cheer them up because they’ve had such a difficult mission! It’s a great way to build bonds and get to know your teammates. Ask them what happened in Vegas! They’ll be more than happy to tell you.
▶ 003. TOO HOT TO HANDLE.
One thing Outsiders will notice immediately upon stepping foot in the Neo Tokyo base is that it is hot. Did someone forget to turn on the air conditioning? The rest of Neo Tokyo doesn’t seem to be any better. With summer approaching, the city has been hit with a heatwave, and it doesn’t help that the heat is interfering with the city’s power generators. This means that not only is it hot, but notices are popping up within everyone’s implants to be mindful of how much electricity they are using. Blackouts appear to be happening all over the base and the city. Electricity is being rationed, and when residents exceed it, it’s cut off.
This is having a devastating impact on the people of Neo Tokyo. The fact that it’s hot and there isn’t much air conditioning is one thing. Hospitals are also struggling from an influx of patients being admitted due to heat stroke, dehydration and severe sunburns. Fires are breaking out more often in the heat and this is only making things worse.
On top of it all, restaurants and stores have been greatly impacted by the electricity rations. Refrigerators and freezers are not working, so food storage is a problem and fresh ingredients are going bad. Restaurants are desperate to sell off what remains of their stock before it spoils. LILITH has been giving out food ration bars and non-perishable meals (such as canned food) and it’s been keeping the people from starving, but their subpar taste doesn’t seem to help the morale one bit.
While LILITH knows that older Outsiders have just had a difficult mission, there’s no choice but to activate them once again. A mission brief will pop up in everyone’s implants:
While things aren’t looking too great, the Neo Tokyo Meteorological Agency is promising that temperatures will go down when the rainy season comes along. There hasn’t been much rain recently, however …
This is having a devastating impact on the people of Neo Tokyo. The fact that it’s hot and there isn’t much air conditioning is one thing. Hospitals are also struggling from an influx of patients being admitted due to heat stroke, dehydration and severe sunburns. Fires are breaking out more often in the heat and this is only making things worse.
On top of it all, restaurants and stores have been greatly impacted by the electricity rations. Refrigerators and freezers are not working, so food storage is a problem and fresh ingredients are going bad. Restaurants are desperate to sell off what remains of their stock before it spoils. LILITH has been giving out food ration bars and non-perishable meals (such as canned food) and it’s been keeping the people from starving, but their subpar taste doesn’t seem to help the morale one bit.
While LILITH knows that older Outsiders have just had a difficult mission, there’s no choice but to activate them once again. A mission brief will pop up in everyone’s implants:
█ █ █ MISSION OBJECTIVE:
✖Contain heat-wave related fires and conduct rescue operations
✖Assist hospitals to care for the influx of patients while they may not have the power to use their medical equipment
✖Distribute water and food rations to citizens in need
✖Assist restaurants and supermarkets to salvage their food supplies as far as possible
While things aren’t looking too great, the Neo Tokyo Meteorological Agency is promising that temperatures will go down when the rainy season comes along. There hasn’t been much rain recently, however …
▶ 004. WELCOME TO OKINAWA.
After a few days of continued efforts to support the people of Neo Tokyo, things seem to have calmed down. LILITH has fired up some backup generators that are able to power the hospital and essential services, most of the fires have been contained, and the hospital has been able to get its patient load under control. LILITH has stepped in to further support the city, with their drones working hard to hand out supplies and provide medical aid. Restaurants continue to struggle, but nobody is starving, and LILITH is working hard to get the power back in operation.
On July 5th, there is a message from Captain Yamakawa:
Departure is set at 1100hrs, and Outsiders will be provided a water bottle and some sunscreen. Once they step through the data portal, they will be met with soft sand, the hot sun, and clear, beautiful waves - Welcome to Okinawa! Specifically, Outsiders will find themselves in Emerald Beach. While the water is pristine, the first thing Outsiders might notice is that there are unnaturally large coconut crabs all over the shoreline; with the majority of them the size of a large dog, and the largest of them about the size of a car.
Nearby to the beach, there are many abandoned fruit farms (such as watermelon, dragon fruits, mango and pineapples) that may have fresh produce for Outsiders to harvest. With how the rift changes the environment, some of these fruits have grown humongous in size. On top of that, the water appears to be cleaner than that found in Tokyo Bay. There are fish still swimming in it, and while some of these fish appear to have mutated, they do not appear inedible.
This is probably what Captain Yamakawa means by ‘supplies’.
On July 5th, there is a message from Captain Yamakawa:
“My Angels of LILITH. You may be at ease now. Our dedicated staff will take over from here. It’s been a difficult month for us all. To show appreciation for your efforts, we have organized a company trip to allow you the appropriate rest and relaxation. We do ask that you gather some supplies since food is short in Neo Tokyo, but that should be an easy task for our talented workforce. Please report to the data portals for departure at once."
Departure is set at 1100hrs, and Outsiders will be provided a water bottle and some sunscreen. Once they step through the data portal, they will be met with soft sand, the hot sun, and clear, beautiful waves - Welcome to Okinawa! Specifically, Outsiders will find themselves in Emerald Beach. While the water is pristine, the first thing Outsiders might notice is that there are unnaturally large coconut crabs all over the shoreline; with the majority of them the size of a large dog, and the largest of them about the size of a car.
Nearby to the beach, there are many abandoned fruit farms (such as watermelon, dragon fruits, mango and pineapples) that may have fresh produce for Outsiders to harvest. With how the rift changes the environment, some of these fruits have grown humongous in size. On top of that, the water appears to be cleaner than that found in Tokyo Bay. There are fish still swimming in it, and while some of these fish appear to have mutated, they do not appear inedible.
This is probably what Captain Yamakawa means by ‘supplies’.
█ █ █ MONSTER DEBRIEF SHEET
NAME: Coconut Crab
SIZE: 24 inches (size of a large dog) to about 5 meters (size of a car)
CLASS: Mild threat
LOCATION: Shoreline, ocean, forests
ABILITIES: Razor-sharp pincers with formidable gripping force - once it grips on to something, it is difficult to break free. Very hard shell that would take effort to crack.
WEAKNESS: Poor eyesight and hearing. Helpless if you tie them up. Becomes stunned with a knock to the head.
EXTRA NOTES: Apparently very delicious.
█ █ █ MISSION OBJECTIVE:
✖ Hunt and capture coconut crabs. Alive is preferable for the best quality meat.
✖ Harvest fresh fruit
█ █ █ ATTACHED PHOTO:
▶ 005. THIS IS A VACATION WE PROMISE.
“Are they seriously making you guys work on your vacation?! This is why we can’t leave everything up to that stiff-ass commander. This should be our beach episode! Don’t worry, your daddy Seok Dang’s got you. Take a crab, take whatever you want, have a damn barbeque! Lie on the beach until your tan comes in. Get nude! Let’s get this party started!”
(LILITH would highly discourage anyone from actually taking off their clothes.) Following Seok Dang’s message, outsiders will notice a pop-up appearing in their eyes, prompting them to accept an outfit upgrade. If accepted, they will find themselves in beach-appropriate attire (player’s choice) using LILITH’s Style Upgrade technology.
Despite Seok Dang’s bid for a party, Outsiders will have to make their own fun in this abandoned beach. They are free to do as they like, whether it’s having a swim, lying in the sand, playing a game of volleyball with an old ball that happens to be lying around, or cracking open a watermelon to share. He does try to encourage things along by sending a few gifts. Through the data portal, several drones will emerge and drop off portable grills, boomboxes, and alcohol from his private stash. For some reason he’s also unleashed a robot that is insistent on challenging Outsiders to a watermelon slicing competition. It looks like he’s serious about this beach episode …
Outsiders may travel between Okinawa and Neo Tokyo throughout the few days using the data portals. There are no resorts in operation in Okinawa, but should they choose to stay near the beach, they may set up a camp or sleep in an abandoned house or hotel.
▶ 006. AFTERWORD.
Welcome to our fifth TDM! All TDM threads are game canon; characters who don't app will be glitched out of this world. As TDM will act as the event, existing characters are heavily encouraged to participate. We encourage this format for top levels: CHARACTER | CANON | CURRENT / NEW CHARACTER. '
There are currently 13 available player slots. New players are welcome to use this TDM to get samples for when APPLICATIONS open.
None of the prompts suit your fancy? Feel free to check out our main base and locations page and make up your own prompts! (Note that Las Vegas is currently being rebuilt and will be made available to visit sometime next month.)
Use the code provided in the ARRIVAL prompt if you'd like to participate in the ice breaker and place it in your top level along with your other prompts. Anything such as civilian name or username can be marked as UNDECIDED if you're unsure of what you'd like your character to have for now. Though it says 'Orientation', existing characters can still participate in the ice-breaker.
For oldbies: for a job well done after the last kaiju mission, 250,000,000 KRYPTOS (~1700 USD) will be deposited into everyone's account. And to our kaiju MVPs: we haven't forgotten you! Those characters will get their due recognition next event. :)
Please note that all tags in this log will count for 2 reward points each and will count towards July AC.
There are currently 13 available player slots. New players are welcome to use this TDM to get samples for when APPLICATIONS open.
None of the prompts suit your fancy? Feel free to check out our main base and locations page and make up your own prompts! (Note that Las Vegas is currently being rebuilt and will be made available to visit sometime next month.)
Use the code provided in the ARRIVAL prompt if you'd like to participate in the ice breaker and place it in your top level along with your other prompts. Anything such as civilian name or username can be marked as UNDECIDED if you're unsure of what you'd like your character to have for now. Though it says 'Orientation', existing characters can still participate in the ice-breaker.
For oldbies: for a job well done after the last kaiju mission, 250,000,000 KRYPTOS (~1700 USD) will be deposited into everyone's account. And to our kaiju MVPs: we haven't forgotten you! Those characters will get their due recognition next event. :)
Please note that all tags in this log will count for 2 reward points each and will count towards July AC.
TDM #5 BREAKDOWN/RECAP (CLICK TO EXPAND)
1. ARRIVAL PROMPT: Newcomers arrive with ocular and brain implants and told a breakdown of the premise with an icebreaker orientation to fill out. Their first cafeteria meal is food ration bars. Newcomers are placed in gray loungewear while they are being sorted into teams.
2. THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME: Senior Outsiders return from Las Vegas via the data portal and will experience side effects such as dizziness, nausea and headaches. Newer Outsiders are tasked with taking care of their senpai.
3. TOO HOT TO HANDLE: There is a heatwave and that's messed up the power grid, leading to a city-wide electricity ration. Hospitals are struggling, fires are breaking out and black outs are happening all over the city. Restaurants are struggling to store their food so there there is a shortage of fresh food. Outsiders are tasked with assisting the hospitals, containing any fires, distributing rations to citizens and assisting restaurants to salvage their supplies.
4. WELCOME TO OKINAWA: With the chaos in the city now under control, LILITH has sent all Outsiders on a vacation to a beach in Okinawa. The caveat is that they will need to gather food supplies. These supplies come in the form of a coconut crab kaiju, fresh fruit and fish.
5. THIS IS A VACATION WE PROMISE: Seok Dang is eager to get this beach party starter. He's updated the implants, allowing all Outsiders to swap into beach-appropriate attire using LILITH's Style Upgrade technology. He's airdropped portable grills, music players and alcohol for Outsiders to enjoy. There is also a robot challenging people to watermelon slicing competitions. Outsiders can do whatever they want to relax at the beach.
d(ish)~
as outwardly energetic and carefree as he is, gojo has been finding plenty of reason to make sporadic trips back to neo tokyo. riding giant crabs and playing volleyballs will only keep the spirit high for so long, especially when geto suguru is very much a presence — even more so with a return to a nostalgia look.
a starry night sky has blanketed the once sunny horizon when he finally approaches suguru and his choice of drink (or whatever remains of it).
plopping down on the sand next to him, gojo has his usual pitch black sunglasses situated on the bridge of his nose. he opted out of seok dang's free style upgrade as well, wearing a too expensive cotton linen hoodie and shorts. leant back, he supports his weight with his arms as he looks out at the crashing waves. ]
Drunk yet? [ he clocked this broody bitch drinking out here a while ago. ]
no subject
( There's no real fight in his voice when he answers, and the quickfire glance he throws Satoru's way isn't quite as hostile as it could be. It's gone too quickly for anything truly noticeable either way, the loose grip on the bottle twitching, liquid sloshing. Geto thinks about asking him if he drinks now, hates the fact that he doesn't know with a fierceness that surprises him, quells that new feeling with another neat swallow.
It burns all the way down still. That feels better. )
It was this or punch something and that little fucking robot is fast.
( He means the watermelon one, his new arch-nemesis. )
no subject
[ an amused grin spreads across his face, a direct contrast to geto's current moodiness. it looks like gojo is in at least higher spirits than his old schoolmate.
but soon enough, that smile wavers mildly at his next words. ]
Never thought that this is how we'd end up back in Okinawa together.
no subject
( Okinawa last time, he means. He tells himself he's been doing such a good job not thinking about it. Throwing Gojo another baleful look, Geto eventually turns back to the tide with a new tension settling along his shoulders. He keeps thinking about how young they were. )
I'm surprised you're not harassing your students with sea cucumbers. Could it be you've grown up, Satoru? I never thought I'd see the day.
( It's meant to be bitter, he means it to be, but it only comes out mildly wistful. A by-product of his drink, maybe? )
Itadori looks tired. I saw him earlier. You should keep an eye on that.
no subject
he is evasive as always, isn't he? ]
We all have to grow up sometime. [ not that he has matured much, if we're going to be completely honest. ] The kids have their own lives here. They don't need me invading their space all of the time. [ they already spend enough quality time daily, eating meals together and hanging out. he can let them have their own fun on the beach, while he busies himself with other things. ]
Ha. You're sure gettin' along well with Yuji. [ a beat. ] He has a lot on his shoulders right now, but he'll work through 'em.
no subject
( Said on a sigh, drawn out. It's as close to the truth as he can get, wrapped up in cynicism like usual. Itadori does make him tired, though not due to any fault of his own. He simply finds it's a lot to be confronted with on the best of days and he doesn't have very many of those to begin with. The boy is too good, Geto is too often reminded of his own burning idealism and the ways in which it all crashed down around him.
It feels too much like history repeating, and nothing anyone can do about it. )
You don't have to worry. I'm not going to harm him. He's very strong, I probably couldn't.
( He doesn't want to. )
no subject
[ it isn't yuji's physical prowess that's cause for concern though. it's his emotional one. guilt, trauma and loss have been eating away at him — and nobody can fault him for it. the things yuji have gone through and experience should have never happened, yet gojo can't provide him with the assurance that he needs. they may be in neo tokyo now, but at any moment, one of 'em could get a new update on what's actually progressing back home. the battle isn't over, which means yuji still has a role to play. ]
He needs that persistent optimism, y'know? Without it, he'll crumble under all of the pressure.
[ just like the way geto had crumbled once upon a time. ]
no subject
( It takes one to know one. But it's a mild protest either way, he doesn't exactly have the room to talk, and he's nothing to either teacher or student these days. His opinion is unneeded. So he bites it back, taking another gulp of alcohol, gaze faraway. Maybe in another universe he could have voiced his concerns better, now they just come out brittle. He doesn't have the right, couldn't do it without being clumsy anyway.
Speaking of, that fathomless look twisting back to Satoru. )
Why are you here? Are you checking up on me?
no subject
Someone has to make sure you don't do anything stupid after getting wasted. [ his gaze settles back on the alcohol bottle in geto's hand, but he does nothing to stop him from continuing to down it. ] I'm here to prevent you from embarrasin' yourself later, Suguru. You're welcome~
[ isn't he just so kind and considerate? doesn't he deserve some gratitude??? ]
no subject
( His grin flashes in the dark, the sea reflecting the light from the moon. It still leaves him feeling wrongfooted, talking to Satoru. It makes him thing he absolutely did the right thing leaving all those years ago. The decade would have certainly been worse had they been able to tear chunks from each other. )
I'm fine, I know how to hold my liquor.
( Maybe. )
no subject
[ blue hues snaps up from beneath a pair of shades to meet a purple pair. his demeanor is devoid of humor as he regards him stoically. ]
I don't want you to die. [ he already lost him once; he doesn't want to lose him again. ] And I think you've had enough for one night, [ should've known geto suguru would be a sad drunk. is he on the brink of bawlin' his friggin' eyes out soon? ] so hand the bottle over.
no subject
You don't get to decide that for me. I'm a grown man, Satoru, I can make my own choices.
( Even if those choices are petulant and bad. )
And I don't like being lied to.
no subject
well, fine. he won't snatch the bottle out of a grown man's hand. ]
I'm not lying. [ just do him a favor and stop fooling yourself into thinking that he would ever lie about something like this, suguru. do better. ]
no subject
Well, I can't imagine why.
( He certainly wishes it had stuck. Having to carry on beyond the certainty of his death is a burden he's having a hard time carrying. He unscrews the bottle again, cap tossed into the sand. )
There's no point to it.
no subject
[ if it wasn't for their vegas trip and spending almost two months in a campervan together, gojo might not have been able to admit it out loud. he still doesn't trust him and he won't hesitate to stop geto if he tries to do anything to his students, but it doesn't mean that he wants him gone. when suguru had first shown up on base, gojo was thrilled at the prospect of reuniting with him, even if it was mired in unresolved hostilities.
that initial excitement has not dwindled. if anything, his time spent with geto out in the desert has only made him miss his best friend even more. he knows that he will never be able to see that young boy again, but while that may be the case between them now, it doesn't mean that he can't work with what's left of him.
as imperfect and immoral as geto suguru may be, gojo satoru has never been a saint in the first place and his inherent selfishness will always eclipse his morality. ]
You might not find any value in that, but I do. Even if that doesn't matter to you, don't you think you owe it to your family to keep on living when you've been given a second chance? Don't waste this opportunity away. It will only be an insult to their faith in you.
no subject
But no, trust Gojo fucking Satoru to circumvent expectations.
The wave of following feeling closes over his throat, Geto has to lift a hand, press it over his eyes. He's not crying, that's foolish. But his eyes feel wet and he has to furiously blink against the tide of all that emotion, so much so that when he finally speaks his voice is thick and cloying. ) Fuck, you -. ( A breath, ragged. ) Who said you could be reasonable?
( Panic builds like it always does, dull and frantic. Geto hunches over himself, the arm holding the bottle wrapping around his chest. Underneath the thin fabric he can feel scar tissue and he digs his thumb in to ground himself. )
It all seems so simple to you, doesn't it? That I can just get up after all of this and keep going. But I don't have anything left, Satoru, there's no cause here, I'll never see my family again, and even if they'd want me to keep living, what am I living for? Going back on my principles? The things that I've done? I don't know how to be here.
( The fire leaves just as quickly, immediately extinguished and Geto pulls a face, drinks again, petulant and stupid. ) And I don't get to have you back. That's not how this works.
no subject
they've had this conversation once before, when both of them had far more walls up between them than they do now. geto wasn't receptive to his words then, but maybe he can try again. can't hurt. right? the worst that can happen is that he won't be swayed — a reaction that gojo has grown used to from him. ]
Why can't it be how this works? [ he's open to it. ] You can have a fresh start in a new world where all the things you've done in the past remains in the past. I don't think your family will fault you for that. I won't either.
[ he never wanted them to be enemies in the first place. ]
Find a new path for yourself, Suguru. You're no longer shackled to a cause greater than yourself, so maybe it's about time you start living for yourself.
no subject
I don't know how to do that.
( Dull, numb. He glances to and from Gojo almost fretfully, mouth working soundlessly for a second. A new path. Living. Whichever he means it brings something almost hysterical to the feeling in his throat, a cloying closed off ache. ) I've been trying for so long. Everything I've done has been for one reason and one reason alone. I wanted our people safe, and I couldn't even do that.
( He'd always known how it would end. He knew what would happen. But LILITH didn't even allow him that. )
How, Satoru? How am I even supposed to start?
no subject
[ new world, new life, new chapter— ]
But if you want, I'm willing to find out with you.
no subject
( Sudden, and surly. The bottle sloshes wetly when he moves again, twisting to face Gojo better. )
You get under my fucking skin.
( But then, he always has. Ever since the first moment they met Gojo Satoru has been a pinprick in his side. He heaves out a sigh, closes his eyes, sandy hand running grit over his face. )
Fine.
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he actually agreed. wait, he isn't just agreeing because he's drunk, is he? ]
Say that again. [ he's recording this shit for proof. ]
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( Instantly suspicious, eyes narrowed. Don't you dare! )
Do you want me to make it a binding vow? That's a little extreme even for you.
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[ say it again, suguru. nothing suspicious going on here. B) ]
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I'll try. But. ( Narrowed eyes. ) You can't be mad at me when it all blows up in our faces. I can only control myself.
( Which might have been the problem in the first place. )
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I won't get mad at you. Promise. [ he isn't going to rush him or expect him to turn over a new leaf; he's just... satisfied that geto's willing to try at all. that's enough for now. ] If it tries to blow up in our faces, then I'll just snuff it out.
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